“It’s the way we tell ‘em!”

In business it is how you tell your business' story that makes the most impact and the honesty to which you are prepared to open up to your client or potential client that will make all the difference in securing new business.

“I wanna tell you a story” was a phrase used by Max Bygraves, an English comedian, singer, stage performer and sometimes actor. Max had his own TV shows when I was growing up as a wee boy in Glenrothes, Scotland and I also remember him on a very successful TV programme called Family Fortunes as well. He would always start a comedic section of any TV show with his well know catchphrase. It was almost like he was inviting you to sit down with him in a familiar place to listen to a bedtime story, it really was that familiar. As a result he tended to get his audience's attention and thus people became accustomed to knowing exactly when to listen.

“It’s the way I tell ‘em!” was another catchphrase I remember from my dim distant youth that was used by the larger than life Northern Irish comedian Frank Carson. He would tell very short punchy jokes and add his catchphrase to the end of the punch line to reinforce that fact that he had finished telling his story and it was now time to laugh and appreciate his joke or series of jokes. Frank would use his catchphrase as, I suppose, a call to action in that the audience had become so accustomed to him rolling out this phrase that they were almost conditioned to laugh at the catchphrase rather than the punch line of his jokes.

There was something about the need for comedians to attach themselves to a catchphrase during the heady days of variety TV that blanketed our screens during the 1970’s and 1980’s. Perhaps it was a way for the many comedians to distinguish themselves from other comedians or was it just another way of them selling you their own USP (unique selling point or ultimate selling proposition).

This tradition continued throughout the early nineties. But as programmes and audiences matured and changed we have seen a move away from catchphrases altogether and we now have comedians who are simply brilliant at telling funny stories. And it is the way that they can tell these funny stories that allow our modern day comedians to fill venues that accommodate 10,000 to 15,000 seat arenas around the world.

To play to such large audiences and yet make each and every audience member feel that the comedian is literally in their living room, speaking to them in an extremely intimate way, is testament to the skill of the individual and their storytelling prowess of our most successful comedians that tour Ireland and the UK.

People like Billy Connolly, Lee Evans, Michael McIntyre, Brendan O’Carroll, Brendan Grace, Bill Murray and his Pub Landlord, to name but a few, are some of the very best storytellers around – fact.

But can our businesses learn from these comedic storytellers? Yes of course businesses can. In fact I would go much further and say that if a business is not telling its own story, through its staff members, then a business is not operating correctly and that business will find it very hard to survive and prosper.

Like a modern day storyteller your businesses' promoters must be delivering every single message with honesty, integrity, passion, openness, enthusiasm and most important of all a SMILE.

This mantra can also be replicated by villages, towns, cities and regions and over the last two or three weeks it would appear that Waterford has a better story to tell than most. What with TF Meagher the creator of the Irish Tricolour, the first Tricolour being raised at 33 The Mall and with Luke Wadding “inventing” St. Patrick’s Day.

To make Waterford appeal to a much wider audience maybe we just need a better catchphrase!

St. Patrick’s Day – Made of Waterford!

Spraoi, Waterford City, St.Patrick's Day

St. Patrick’s Day is often seen, in many circles, as the start of the tourism season. After all this is the first big event after the traditional celebrations of Christmas and New Year.

Certainly in my past life, at Waterford Castle, this day would be seen by champions of the mashie niblick as a date when you could look forward to better golfing weather and the promise of lots of course work, with much hollow tining, to make the greens as smooth and velvety as the proverbial baize on a billiard table. This by all accounts is the Holy Grail for many a good and bad golfer, as you “drive for show and putt for dough”, when chasing that infuriating wee white ball around the 18-holes of a golf course. It is the greens that spoil a scorecard and never the actual golfer. Like the modern day formula one driver, all golfers have a myriad of readymade excuses that tell the story of a bad round of golf.

Luke Wadding

When I first arrived in Waterford City I was not sure what to expect from my first parade in March 2001. But I was pleasantly surprised and I believe that I have attended nearly every parade since that date, missing 2014 to march in New York with the 69^th Infantry Division. I even used to get invited to sit in the posh seats, but hey-ho times have changed and I now happily stand with the madding crowds waving my tricolour and rather proudly wearing a sprig of Shamrock.

Surprise, Surprise, no not a reference to that hideous programme, I did plant last year’s Shamrock in a pot and despite having not a scintilla of green in my fingers the sprig has miraculously survived for twelve months and we will be wearing our own home-grown Shamrock this year at the parade.

My interest in all things relating to St. Patrick’s Day grew when I would later discover, probably around 2002 or 2003, a small statue of a certain Mr Luke Wadding, an Irish Franciscan Friar, outside a rather derelict old religious building in Greyfriars. On closer inspection of the statue we can read that Luke was quite literally responsible for putting St. Patrick’s Day on the religious calendar, after apparently lobbying Pope Charles I, and therefore it is he who is responsible for the celebrations we see around the world on 17^th March.

A green Sphinx!

Such is the global phenomenon that is St. Patrick’s Day all manner of “wonders of the world” are now turning green every 17^th March – Edinburgh Castle, the Leaning Tower of Pisa, One World Trade Centre, Christ the Redeemer, the Colosseum, the Sphinx and even Nelson’s Column have all succumbed to the charm of the Irish and been bathed in a green hue to honour St. Patrick’s Day.

I do however wonder if yet again Waterford is missing a trick and an opportunity here!

As we all should know the Irish Tricolour was flown for the first time on 33 The Mall by Thomas Francis Meagher, a Waterford born native, and we can also lay claim to “inventing” St. Patrick’s Day, albeit as a religious day and not the parade day we celebrate now, but invent this day a Waterford born native did.

So, two “things” that speak of the essence of Irishness, recognised and identified around the world as being integral to one’s Irish roots have a direct connection to Waterford City. Yet we are still better known for glass and crystal and not these two iconic images that tens of millions of people hold dear to their hearts on 17^th March every year.

Edinburgh's magnificent Castle

Surely, we have an unbelievable opportunity to put Waterford at the very heart of all these celebrations of Irishness and it is a prospect not to be missed.

As I have said many times before we just need to be a wee bit more imaginative and creative in how we promote this ancient City that has shaped modern day Ireland.

Nobody does it better!

Richard Kiel from The Spy Who Loved Me.

Last weekend Waterford City hosted the sixth annual 1848 Tricolour Celebration event and I am very proud that as one of the hard working voluntary Committee members I have taken the opportunity to write, this week, about the huge effort, commitment and sacrifice given to this event by a relatively small Committee of nine and a half good men and women of Waterford (well Scotland for me if the truth be told!).

Over the last twelve months this group have been working tirelessly away in the meeting rooms of The Granville Hotel, to deliver not only the annual gala dinner, historic talks, schools programme and Flag Raising ceremony but the programme was expanded this year to acknowledge the very important 1916 Commemoration in a way that will NOT be replicated anywhere else in Ireland during this year.

This committed band of brothers and sisters produced a weekend's worth of events that could have graced any national event calendar and in recognition of the magnitude of the professionalism of the events delivered our Waterford City held centre stage with our national broadcaster on Saturday evening on both of the main news bulletins. It is these small wins and PR opportunities that are firing a warning shot across the bows of others cities that Waterford is not prepared to lie down and accept the occasional crumbs from the top table that are so often fed to us every now and again.

Great picture from Noel Browne.

Quite simply we want a bigger slice of the cake!

A summary of last weekend shows just what a significant programme this committee delivered. On Friday 4^th March 100 people, from 50 different nationalities, were naturalised as Irish Citizens, in City Hall, opposite the very spot where TF Meagher raised the first ever Irish Tricolour flag on 7^th March 1848.

On an unusually sunny afternoon, on Saturday 5^th March, 2,500 people watched as over 90 re-enactors staged the Easter Rising battle for the GPO, on The Mall, outside the Bishop’s Palace. This 40 minute historic re-enactment included forces from both side of the conflict and a period British armoured car with a Vickers and a Lewis machine gun. Whilst this event captured the public’s imagination the ticketed gala dinner that followed was really the corporate flag waving event that delivered the goods for Waterford City.

Over one hundred and fifty people attended the sell out gala dinner in The Granville Hotel. This event was attended by Mayor John Cummins, Ambassadors from the United States and Canadian Embassies, representatives from Government, members of the 69^th Infantry Division in New York, American film production companies, and 45 guests from the Twin Cities of Minnesota to name but a few. Keynote speakers were Vice Admiral Mark Mellett and Lt Col Sean M Flynn Commander of the 69^th Infantry Division New York, with musical accompaniment by the Island of Ireland Peace Choir and the Hounds of Fin.

The gala dinner was one of the best attended and certainly one of, if not the most positive, corporate events I have experienced in my time here in Waterford City. The City was sold to our guests in a glowing light and I am sure that no other City or committee could have put on such a noteworthy event.

Another action shot from Noel Browne.

On Sunday 6^th March the weekend’s events were wrapped up with the Flag Raising Ceremony on The Mall. Again this event was attended by a significant number of dignitaries and representative counties and despite some cold and damp weather, around 1200 people watched the proceedings and listened intently to the speeches. This event was supported in great numbers by local bands, the Civil Defence and of course the Waterford Naval Reserve providing all the pomp and ceremony which befitted such a symbolic event.

So Waterford City take a bow.

To the voluntary committee of Ann, Eddie, Paul, Janet, Mags, Jonathan, James, Cian and John you ALL played a blinder – roll on 2017!

Lost In Kilkenny!

With the papers, quite rightly, giving blanket coverage to #GE16, and journalists and their editors writing many column inches debating the rights and wrongs of the possible makeup of the next Government. I thought that it would be appropriate to stay away from such political commentary this week and besides it has become very clear that I not great at making predications. I had tipped Scotland to win the Six Nations!

I did get three out of the four candidate selections right, but admittedly in the wrong order, and I did suggest that a large cohort of the population were not engaged with politics and therefore they would not be voting. The 36.3% of the electorate or 30,000 people in the Waterford constituency who did not vote could have made a substantial difference to the final results, but as they did not engage or were not engaged, through what was after all a very sterile campaign, we returned two new candidates and two existing candidates. Clearly there was something for everyone from #GE16.

Having decided to stay away from the politics over the weekend, though still receiving regular updates directly from the count centre on the auld smart phone, I squeezed into the Lycra, packed the unicycle into the Mini and headed to Clonmel to take part in a charity cycle for Down Syndrome Ireland and specifically the Cycle for Sarah.

Around 100 Lycra clad people took part in the 130km Cycle for Sarah and there were six plucky members of the Waterford Biscuit Club who made the trip on a very, very cold and wintery Saturday morning. Suitably dressed in our unique Cookie Monster cycling tops we headed out of Clonmel shortly after 10:00 and cycled straight into a freezing cold Arctic wind as we set our sights on getting to the pit stop in Kilkenny as fast as possible.

Once out of Clonmel the large group naturally began to fracture into smaller packets of biscuits and being the competitive Scotsman that I am I chased down the guys at the front and soon we were a small selection of six, six men that really had no idea what so ever where we were actually going.

Spotted hiding in Kilkenny. 

As we ploughed on, counting down the kilometres, one of the marshals directed us right, off the main road, and straight up a rather steep hill and onto some very quiet back roads that seemed to be taking us in an easterly direction. We eventually decided to turn left cycling a few more kilometres, up some more steep hills, through some very small hamlets and onto the ubiquitous single track roads you inevitably come across in Ireland when you take a wrong turn.

Clearly we were lost in Kilkenny.

But no man worth his salt would ever admit to being lost, so we continued battling the wind and cold and then “BANG”! No were not shot by some Deliverance cast member we had a puncture that took an eternity to fix due to a very finicky valve that would not play ball. We had stopped in the middle of nowhere and the silence was only broken by the sound of the odd gunshot, crows calling and the cackle of male pheasant who was no doubt laughing at us. Eventually, we got moving once again and steered roughly in the direction of Kilkenny.

SPEEEEEEED!

Arriving with hypothermia in Kilkenny we stopped for a warm cup of coffee and some soup, where I checked the election update and knew that there was every possibility of some shock results on the way. I jumped back onto the bike for a quick flat-out blast back to Clonmel to get home to see if I needed to buy yet another wooden spoon!

It was a great way to spend a Saturday morning and to stay somewhat remote from all the #GE16 results. The company was great and the scenery was not too bad either.

They think it is all over!

Well it will be on Friday 26^th February for the next five year. Or will it?

In under 24 hours we will all be in the solitude of an election ballot booth, pencil or pen in hand, a ballot paper facing us, displaying in alphabetical order the very best profile shots of the 12 candidates on offer here in Waterford City and County.

If you were to believe all the election spin we are reading, hearing and seeing on our national TV channels, then every party is going to get the number one vote from every doorstep visited. This of course means that all 12 of our candidates will be elected!

In our four TD constituency we will of course only see four TD’s represent us in the next Dáil and these four good men or women will hope to have five years to make a real difference to Waterford and the people they represent. So making the right decision will have a bearing on how our City and County perform over the next five years and yet I do feel that there may be a minority Government formed and we will be back in the same sterile election booth sooner rather than later.

Quite clearly there will be some very interesting shenanigans post #GE16 when the main political parties start the political scrambling and begin to barter a better deal with Independents, the smaller parties and anyone who can be bought and sold for a handful of gold.

We may even end up with an old historical political map where the odd few battle hardened Independents can hold a coalition Government to ransom. Where support votes can be guaranteed with vast sums of money for roads, for schools and of course the Independents' favourites hospitals and education.

Though only living here in Waterford City for fifteen years I do recall in previous Dáils many political bounty hunters making lots of hay whilst the sun shone with cobbled together Governments that were literally held together with no more than sticky tape. This type of Government is no good to man or beast and in fact makes an utter farce of the current political system.

Do we really wish to see the return to the omnishambles of a Government where the future governance of the whole country is held to a payoff by the localised whims and promised votes of country bumpkin politics? This type of political rule is unfortunately still at large in Ireland and we need to move away from such Dickensian ways and practices. But I fear this time around the politics will not have engaged with sufficient “new” voters to move us in the right direction and deliver a better and more transparent political system.

Rest assured that the usual suspects who have graced the front pages of our board sheets, for all the wrong reasons over the last five years, will be returned to the Dáil for #GE16. These local “cowboy politicians” have for some unexplained rationale lots of grassroots support, in some abundance, as there is no real alternative to the political malaise that grips the Country.

I have often wondered if the political Status Quo actually suits the current politics we have to live with on a daily basis, as to have to engage with potential new voters takes time, effort, and above all an awful lot of imagination.

We all know that imagination and our current political representatives are not a marriage made in heaven! So it may well take another generation to make a real change in the way we engage and vote in Ireland or it might take a hung Government and a few months of political infighting, bickering and squabbling to finally get all voters to see the woods for the trees. 

#GE16 will not go down in history as the most exciting, but do hold your breath as another #GE may just be around the corner.

Do our Festivals matter?

Festivals & mud go hand in hand!

Yes they do!

As a City and County that prides itself on a huge number of diverse annual festivals and events, some of which have actually reached International status, we should be very proud of the fact that we can state that Waterford is one of the busiest festival regions in the country.

Yet we are still, in the perception of many, lagging way behind the likes of Galway, Dublin and Cork, and when you look at what is on offer I often wonder why we are perceived to be somehow a lesser festival product than these other Cities.

Maybe they just shout much louder than us!

At last week’s plenary meeting of Waterford Council, in addition to clarification on the newly introduced Commercial Rates levy on empty premises, which along with the general commercial rates revenues, circa €33,000,000, which help fund our many festivals and events, the issue of festival funding was discussed and debated quite robustly by a number of our Councillors.

It was refreshing to see such vigorous debating, with a number of valid and poignant reasons why the proposed contributions by Council to festivals and events had to be right for the City and County.

Waterford Walls.

With circa €1,430,000 of disposable spend available to the 58 identified festivals and events the Council must get the support grant structure accurate, fair and true, to nurture the very best of these, whilst allowing a significant financial contingency to support new fledgling festivals and events, that will ultimately replace those that have come to the end of their natural lifespan.

We do need a constant conveyor belt of new festivals and events and that is why any grant or support funding available must be distributed as equitably as possible and disseminated by knowledgeable qualified people who know, or at the very least have familiarity with, what will and will not work for Waterford.

The initial draft Council document has suggested that future funding would be evaluated by a nominated three person panel. Quite rightly our Councillors literally jumped all over this suggestion by stating that these decisions should be made by Waterford’s Councillors, as they are elected to represent the people and the businesses of Waterford. An external panel, no matter what their experience, will not be as focused and or as in touch with Waterford’s event needs.

For the first time in a long time it was refreshing to hear our Councillors speaking with one voice on this matter and demanding that the Executive bring the issue of allocating grant funding back to the Councillors for their direct input and ultimately authorisation.

It would be absolutely criminal to think that a festival or event could thrive or fail on the recommendation of a three person panel who may not know the history or relevance of a particular festival or event.

The support funding available to festivals and events is a vital building block to allow growth, regionalisation and ultimately, where relevant, nationalisation through the generation of extra bed nights to the City and County.

From small acorns large trees can grow, but only if the soil conditions are right and the tree is maintained and looked after.

Up, up & away!

We can see the huge and well deserved success that Spraoi is now having, despite loss of some national funding, and the acorn planted many, many years ago has now seen this organisation support its first ever UK festival, in sunny Scarborough.

The variety in our festivals and events is a joy to behold and whilst some get huge grant income, up to circa €430,000 that some might feel could be better spent, others clearly get smaller contributions that perhaps fit the profile of a fledgling festival looking to establish roots and grow.

The split between City and County is always an interesting debate but we all know that a great festival or event for City or County is good for everyone concerned.

After all are we not one of the same?

Does my bum look big in this?

The #GE16 button has now well and truly been pushed and as we now countdown the days to polling day, 26^th February, we have already seen our streetscape change and alter with the plethora of election posters proliferating every lamppost and telegraph pole across the City and County.

Despite the best efforts of storm Imogen to blow these posters from the poles and posts, over the last week, most have managed to cling on due to the wonders of the modern day cable tie, which obviously has amazing tensile strength.

Having observed the many posters and leaflets, that have started filling up my letter box, I started to consider if the candidates “on offer/for sale” actually fit the party they are supporting and standing for.

For example you will know what I am implying when you see a picture of a friend or family member with their pet and you start to see similarities in looks and there are many examples of people posting pictures on social media and they look exactly like their pet!

It is uncanny that some people and their pets are a perfect match and I started to wonder if this was the case with candidates and their political parties.

Nickel mining.

This got me thinking if our #GE16 election candidates actually mirror their party and vice versa, basically do they do exactly what it says on the tin?

For example, if we have a candidate who is promoting an eco-friendly all things green ethos, does said candidate travel around the City and County, electioneering, on a bicycle or perhaps they might have one of those Nissan Leaf cars that is promoted as being Polar Bear and Penguin friendly. But in reality the energy and technologies needed to actually produce the car in the first place are in fact far from eco-friendly. I would find it hard to give such a candidate a vote if in fact they did not practice what they are preaching and could be seen driving around in V8 petrol Range Rover.

I suppose that we all need to listen to what our candidates are advocating and decipher whether or not they are actually practising their pulpit ramblings and electioneering husting promises.

Those candidates on the right that are promoting a business agenda, job creation and a commercial recovery under their party manifesto, which in all honesty is a book of pipedreams and fairytales, do they have any track record in creating, developing and nurturing a business?

Unless you have been in the extremely stressful position where you have to actually generate €10 in sales to make €1 to spend you will have absolutely no idea just how hard it is to succeed or fail in business. If your role in life and specifically your salary is not dependent on actually making your own money to live off then how can you possibly be in a space that relates to a business specific mantra.

Alternatively, those candidates on the left hand side of the centre line, who are championing Citizen Smith’s “power to the people” politics, are certainty not in the same space as many of the electorate they are proposing to support. After all how can you possibly be in that space when your Dáil salary will be circa €87,000 and average annual expenses available could be as much as €34,000 (net) and then there are other allowances on top of this to add to the gravy train.

Who bought one of these?

It is all very well that these candidates are talking about cutting this and cutting that but I do not see many of these people offering to accept the average industrial wage or in fact a living wage! And I do not know how many of us also get paid to travel to and from work, so why are such large and excessive expenses needed as well?

So to come back to “does my bum look big in this”? I do think that we have to look at what is on offer and ask ourselves if any of the candidates essentially match the politics being championed. 

If you have to question this then maybe you will have to look elsewhere.